On Being a Parent

Lara was not quite herself today. It started with her waking up at 6:30am or perhaps a little before. Lately, she's been waking up closer to 8, so this was a bit early for her. Later in the morning, she got pretty fussy. She told me "owie tee" (owie teeth) and asked for "meninin" (medicine). But still later she continued to be fussy and asked repeatedly for her paci. Now, Lara only uses her pacifier for sleeping times, so I atrributed this toward nothing more than a growing attachment to her pacifier. I told her no, not realizing that the poor girl was trying to tell me she was tired! Instead, to calm her down, I took her for a walk while Dustin got a delicious lunch ready for us. I finally caved as she screamed down the road and I ran back inside for her pacifier. Deciding that I do not like my ever growing pudgy belly, I booked it around the South/East side of town pushing Lara's stroller, only paying attention to the sore feeling growing up through my legs, quite characteristic of individuals who don't take care of themselves. After a 15 minute weak work-out, I crashed on the bench outside the library and found that Lara was fast asleep with a blanket covering part of her face and her paci somewhat dangling out of her mouth. Lara hasn't fallen asleep in her stroller since she was 2 months old. That was back when I walked Lara around the mall on cold, blistery nights because she would only sleep in some rhymthic fashion. So I sat and watched Lara sleep for a few minutes until she woke up. When she woke up, we continued on our way and stopped by to wish our neighbors congratulations on their new nephew. And we discovered that the same issue existed in their house as well-Macy woke up way too early and was being fussy all morning. She took an afternoon nap, which is uncharacteristic of her. Must be something in the water.


Today, we all closed our eyes and slept an hour or so away. It's been rainy here and getting cold. Which I totally love, but it can wear on a body after so many days.


Lara spent the evening with our neighbors, so excited to see Macy that I couldn't even get a goodbye. Dustin and I drove around Bloomington looking for a Pumpkin Spice latte and finally arrived at our destination. It was a church meeting, of sorts, where Dustin and I were welcomed, of sorts, as soon-to-be Directors of Community Groups. Director is always made plural at our church when you are married, though I really see this as Dustin's role. We left the meeting early, in our somewhat typical parental fashion, as there was a toddler who needed to get to bed.


So here I sit, the day a whirlwind day, and the week only to get much, much worse. I think on Saturday, I have planned in my calendar to sit and breathe.



Here is a picture of Lara in her Sunday School classroom. Half way through church, I decided to peek in and see how she was doing. I normally never do that, but this day I just thought I would. I pulled Lara out when I watched the other 3 & 4 year old children bounce off the walls, scream, throw toys, and move furniture around. There was no order maintained. Unfortunately, I have high expectations when it comes to my daughter's classroom. But the real moment came when the teacher mentioned to me that Lara wouldn't sit still and listen to the book the teacher was reading, and this was distracting to the other children. I groaned inwardly, realizing my daughter was undoubtedly the most difficult child in the classroom. Because she's not yet two. I realized I made a terrible mistake putting her in there and the fact that she didn't want me to leave proved it. She didn't like it there. So I took a walk with her and Lara asked to see Reece and Addy, her best friends at church I promised her she would play with that day. We peaked in the nursery, and there they were. Reece is one month older than Lara, and Addy 6 months younger. It was much better, and there Lara stayed, not quite ready to move on, content with mama leaving.


(in case the whole age thing is confusing for you, let me just say that it is still up in the air how the 0-4 year olds are to be divided, and right now, there is no system. Last week, the room Lara was in was the toddler class, which this week, became the preschool class. Last week, there was no nursery, and this week there was.)



It's wonderful to be a parent, but I sometimes wonder between now and later, when I will stop feeling a little dizzy.