Surgery

Surgery went really well. My ENT surgeon is fantastic. The surgery took something around 3 hours. There was A LOT of cholesteatoma, and it had even found its way to my facial nerve. I was under the impression that when that happened, you could only sort of clean it off, but not actually remove the cyst for fear of damaging the nerve. Well, I was wrong, because Dr. Finch (he did not do the surgery last time) said he got it off the nerve and is quite confident he got all the cyst out this time. No radical mastoidectomy, which means in 6 months, I will go in for a quick surgery to make sure the cyst really IS gone, then they will put in a prosthetic hearing bone. Which means, I am one step closer to some sort of ear normalacy.

Currently, I am still in recovery mode. I went into surgery with a cold, so that is making the recovery a little harder, because my throat is a little scratchy and I am congested. I am not allowed to blow my nose, either. Also, I've a permanent tube in my right ear, so that ear hurts a little and is healing up too. So all in all, this recovery feels a little more heavy than last time. It's hard to sleep, which is okay, because I still have to be up every 3-4 hours to nurse Claire. Eventually, I will go back to normal.

Coming out of anesthesia is awful for me. You're so groggy and yucky and a little queasy. This time around, I had to have an EKG while they considered keeping me at the hospital overnight because of a high heart rate. I wasn't a bit concerned while they did the tests because I know my heart is good. The resident dr. agreed, and just ordered some meds to help calm my heart down. I had to stay in recovery to be monitored for an hour, but my heart rate was back to normal before the hour was up.

The recovery room is weird. It's just a long room, with rows and rows of beds full of groaning and sometimes almost-screaming patients. It's not fun trying to wake up when the lady next to you is squirming in pain and yelling at the doctor. This happened to me last time too. I'm a naturally unsympathetic person, so these types of people bother me. I have a very "suck it up and deal with it" mentality, which is what got me through 2 natural childbirths. My ear was hurting pretty badly, but I didn't ask for any meds until they told me they were keeping me longer. Then I told them to go ahead and give me something for the pain because I knew my heart wouldn't relax until the pain had subsided, and I didn't want to be admitted to the hospital. I know, I need to work on my sympathy and empathy skills.

This time, when I was given the clear to go home, I went straight home. No laying around to wait for the queasiness to subside. I knew it wouldn't, and I knew my mother and sister-in-law needed to get home. An upset stomach, and I'm the world's biggest baby.

So here I am, trying to take it easy. I can't wait until I am back to normal, I can shower, I can start hearing better. Both ears are kinda gross, so I don't hear real well. But I'm all right.

It's starting to dawn on me how I've entered a life of chronic ear problems. There will undoubtedly be more surgeries for me down the road. It depresses me, but I am thankful for the patience and courage it is building in me. I am thankful for the advances in medicine--where would I be if I lived in the 17th century? I wish my ears could be normal. But I am lucky in other ways too.